Highlights/Lowlights:
- Going to Bourg d’Oisons for the motorcross to celebrate our anniversary
- Callum struggling with the transition of being back in an all-french school
- My new job and workplace
- Colin going to Hungary to support technical training
- Exercising – my health
- 36th Coupe Icare – spectacular!
JUMPY/TOP DOWNER/FLY PIPER – these are the pigeons which used to roost across from our sunroom. They’d peer in, threatening to come inside for a visit. Now that house is torn down and Callum wonders where they’ve gone. The two fat healthy rats that used to live by our building have also deserted us because of the construction next door. Though I’m not usually enamored of rats I was sad to see them go. They were interesting to watch from two stories up. They particularly loved to dine on the flowers that grew on the vine that entwined up the wall.
SEPTEMBER 7th - TURBO SPEED ... BRING IT ON.
Everything has sped up.
I had a job interview on Callum’s first day of school.
I was hired on the spot (yesterday).
I may start training for my job tomorrow afternoon, and have my first client on Friday morning.
I may have three "missions" by next week - three sets of students... and that's the week Colin is in Hungary.
I feel like I'm riding a firecracker.
Callum’s school had the school parents' assembly and grande section orientation to goals and expectations by Callum's teacher. I spent 1.5 hours of desperately trying to understand French and realizing how ill-equipped I am for preparing my child for what is to come.
We'll just have to take it one permission slip at a time.
Monday - Callum started swimming with his class today.
They get 16 classes of swimming.
Apparently he sat near the back of the bus with a friend, so he can't be doing too badly.
What a brave little soul.
His teacher is very "structured".
The classroom is almost entirely decorated in Black and White.
That tells you a lot about him right there.
Hopefully his strength will be preparing the kids for Grade One academic expectations.
Hopefully he'll do it in a kind and sometimes inventive manner. I get the feeling he has the discipline part nailed. That may be a blessing given how many rambunctious little boys are in the class. They are, after all, born in the year of the monkey.
SEPTEMBER 9th - REFLECTIONS ON MY NEW JOB
I'm excited to be employed by ETC Group/Logos for several reasons.
a) I love to teach. I take great pleasure in assisting people in achieving their goals.
b) It works with my current time constraints (Callum's schedule) and the need for family balance.
c) I was shit scared about finding a job in France when I speak Francaise like a three year old, there are hiring freezes on and people are losing jobs.
d) Working part-time means (theoretically) I can continue with my French classes.
e) My new boss is already talking about possibilities for the future.
I will start as a teacher with specific contracts. I will teach individuals and groups (2 - 5 people) in either the Logos meeting rooms or within the corporations themselves. There is potential for more though in the next year or two, which would be perfect timing for me and my family, and as a transition into the regular work force (with networking opportunities to boot).
The ETC Group has three streams - relocation, translation and language instruction. Over the last few years the ETC Group has been acquiring businesses all over France which specialize in these areas. They started restructuring in January and are currently trying to establish consistency in quality and presentation, from marketing to proposals to execution and follow-up. Fanny is potentially interested in how I can contribute to their goals (from my resume and experience) as a full-time employee presenting workshops, coaching, developing and consolidating teaching materials, assembling best practices, team building, and other areas that require the pursuit and establishment of pedagogical excellence (when she used that pair of terms I grinned inside - I used to have "pedagogical excellence" near the top of my resume and actually had to remove it because some people who were interviewing me didn't understand it). The ETC Group vision is to provide a united front to their many international and local clients (in the fields of science and health [ie. the synchrotron; Schneider Electric; pharmaceutical companies], tourism [ski hills and outdoor equipment ie. Petzel], IT [ie. Yahoo], utilities [ie. Isere Gas and TransIsere - the bus company], etc.). It is a company in transition and that's an exciting time for me to arrive. I tend to thrive on those types of change waves. Currently though, I am strictly an English teacher.
The down side is that currently there are no best practices being discussed, team meetings, training, etc. for the language teachers. It's a very solo/fly by your pants type of job. I'm glad I've got experience with teaching/training in so many different types of environments. I'm also glad that I have friends who can offer me a few insights. I take this seriously and I'm surprised at the lack of support they offer their teachers. Consistency of product and presentation are so critical. And training is way less expensive than turnover or damage to an international reputation. I know that teaching language takes a lot of skill, experience and insight. I intend to represent the profession, ETC Group and myself with integrity, enthusiasm and results.
I am truly fortunate with both my experience and my timing. Someone is looking out for me.
CALLUM, FRIENDS and SCHOOL
I've met a few moms, but many of them don’t live downtown like we do. However, I have made connections through Callum's school, random meetings in the parks and Open House International (the organization for bringing together people from elsewhere and French people who have lived in other countries). Of the two connections through Callum's school one family moved on to the local primary school (Callum is in the Grande section, equivalent to kindergarten), but I hope to keep connecting with her anyways. The other family I’ve invited over for a playdate. What's great at this point is that we keep bumping into people that either I know or Callum know. It's becoming OUR town. And there are certainly many interesting people here.
There are many types of individuals/families who are attracted to living here (I'm talking specifically about transplanted people). There are the adventurers who are healthy of mind and body. They embrace change. There are those who are eager to leave where they were and just ended up here. There are many who found professional opportunity in Grenoble and stayed because they grew to love it. There are those who are unhealthy and here they can hide - ie. those who are estranged from their families or don't want to live by the rules of the country they were born into. Here they can lay low or be exotic or be righteous or blossom into who they were meant to be. I'm open to all, but am trying to cultivate relationships that are a mutual trade of energy/insights/etc... I don't have as much energy as I used to. I need to make sure I have enough chutzpa to keep my family on an even keel in a foreign environment.
In any case, because I cannot speak French, the % of the population that we have to choose friends from is as motley a hodge-podge as the group that was on the first boat from England to Oz. Therefore it will take time to find people who resonate - who get along with all three of us and vice versa. In the meantime, it's lonely. I can easily find people to hang out with, but not so easily find people who are ready, willing or able to "understand" me/us and incorporate the desires/delights of a 5 year old acrobat.
Regarding language acquisition, I inquired about French classes for Callum when we arrived. I wanted to help him prepare. The only thing I could find was tutoring at 40 Euros an hour. That's more than $60 Canadian! It seems that people believe kids will just get it by osmosis. I think they get it because they don't survive otherwise. Our friends' little girl, a year older than Callum, cried every day for the first 4 months. It's brutal. I ache for Callum a lot of times, and am grateful that he is social and brave. But I get very frustrated that I can't help smooth the way for him in regards to learning French. I can't even coach him or help him on the playground. Yesterday he came home with scratches all over his face - missing skin really near his eye. Callum told one story and his teacher told another. I'm not happy about this but we will prevail and I'll keep a close eye on the situation. I am hoping that the teacher will be good at preparing him for next year, while still providing the room and support for these kids to be kids. At least Callum has friends in his class, and he's not physically small(their age group is the oldest in the school, so I'm hoping there'll be less chance of bullying. Callum isn't a push-over, but some of the big kids last year were problematic).
While I'm concerned about the language issue and bullying, I do believe there are benefits to this school system. They certainly prepare the Grande section for academia, and the students are also offered a well-rounded curriculum. Callum's taking swimming classes for 16 weeks, they do gardening for six weeks in the fall and the spring, they participate in gymnastics, they attend choir on Monday mornings from January to June, they take field trips to museums and art galleries, they do visitations to homes for the aged, they have special projects on Thursday afternoons where the classes mix and each teacher provides a special theme not specifically focused on the three R's (maybe safety, special art projects, how to drive, music, animal care, etc.). And Callum doesn't have to "nap" at school anymore, which he is happy about.
Callum loves being social, so he's motivated to make friends and is well liked. But it's hard for him. He doesn't have a single English-speaking friend here that lives close by and sees on a regular basis. He's lonely even though he's intensely active and involved. This is the part of living in France that is hardest on our hearts.
HOMESICK
We're all homesick. We don't regret coming to France and there's a lot to appreciate here, but we definitely miss Canada. We miss our community of friends, family, the ocean, the ease of living in a place where we can understand the language and where service is a value many people share. I miss the writing community too. I know that when we don't live here anymore there are things we'll miss about the Isere region and Europe. I love how entwined human and natural history can be here. The Alps are amazing, we've done some great day trips, lots of hiking, attended cool festivals, and explored parts of England, Germany and Italy as well as France. The architecture is fantastic, the people are warm, and every day contains unexpected challenges and delights. It's exhausting though. It doesn't seem to get easier.
Callum is amazing. He's been hiking with us, sometimes up to 9 km in a day. There is such a plethora of places to explore around here. It will get easier for him as he learns more French. Kids gravitate towards him.
Colin has had a hard time. The French people he works with are sometimes resentful that English is the business language. As a result they ie. sometimes refuse to slow down their French or speak in English in internal meetings or in the cafeteria. He is making some good allies though and has a solid professional reputation. He went to Budapest for work one week this month and will likely be going to Spain next month. Schneider shows a lot of trust in his abilities. He's also biking back and forth to work on a path that follows the river, that helps him recalibrate and find some peace.
We're finding loads of things to do. The festivals are amazing. Two weeks ago we attended the Coupe Icare (www.coup-icare.org) which is an international festival of air (hot air balloons, paragliding, parachuting, etc.) and the next day I did a 7 hour hike over the Chartreuse mountains. I love the villages, the markets, the Alpine activities year round, the cafes, the way the French are passionate about everything and wear their hearts on their sleeves and then forgive or offer help just as fast as they can lose their tempers. They are also great rule makers and breakers, so it's fascinating to figure out how to "be" here.
As for me - I'm training for an ultra-marathon (in Holland, 200 km over 4 days) or an Olympic-length triathlon (in Annecy), working, taking French lessons and run the household. Given that even paying an electrical bill can take three times as long (because it's in French) I find life very busy. Plus there are school field trips to support, play-dates in French and Colin's family is in England and Scotland - I've spent 6 weeks up there this year. And we've had 4 sets of visitors from Canada already! I do need to get back to cultivating my writing though. I need it. I can feel it building inside me like a giggle behind a hand.
Our friends who were here a year and are going back to Victoria this week have just left our home. They came to drop off some camping books and a couple of fans. It made us feel so nostalgic to talk to them. Part of me is envious that they are returning to Victoria, to their community there, to the ocean. Colin is definitely blue.
We're starting to know more people. Yesterday around town we ran into three different families that we know. Unfortunately, if the adults speak English the kids still usually don't. Callum is still quite lonely. In the evening Callum and I were supposed to go to a play (we had free tickets). We walked and listened to thunder rumbling, and then the skies opened up on us. The lightening was flashing and the BOOM CRACK sounds following were crazy loud. It was right on top of us. The air was vibrating with electricity. Callum was mad, scared and screaming and I was soaked through in about 30 seconds (Callum had the wisdom to insist on bringing an umbrella). Callum marched home yelling, "I hate France" in beat to his footsteps. He swears he will never go outside again. I love the thunderstorms. It reminds me of prairie storms and drama in the sky when I worked in Florida and Ontario.
I'm getting better at managing our money here. It's still really challenging, but we're being quite disciplined so that we can eliminate our debt. We trying to balance out taking advantage of delicious choices for adventures here, and setting ourselves up well for the future.
Hope all is well with you.
Loads of love,
Ramona J. Bucknell
Thursday, January 7, 2010
8th Anniversary Love Letter - September 1, 2009
(After 11 years of good lovin’)
This is a love letter.
When you begin reading it might not seem like one, but it is. Keep reading until the end.
Over the duration of our marriage we’ve navigated through many challenges …
• Between us we’ve had 10 surgeries in 11 years
o Back; shoulder; ectopic twins; D&C; Callum caesarean; D&C; knee; TL; Hernia x2
• Totaled one vehicle but owned 7 cars and 2 motorcycles in total
• Explored 14 countries and lived in 2
o Oz; New Zealand; Malaysia; Thailand; Cambodia; Laos; India; Scotland; England; Mexico; U.S.A.; France; Italy; Canada
• Experienced desert expanse, prairie flatness, bottoms of oceans and tops of mountains, from -52C to + 46 C
• We’ve driven across most of Canada four times. We’ve flown to the U.K. 6 times.
• We’ve lived in 11 places in less than 10 years
o We’ve made our home in Point Grey Vancouver, in a cabin by a lake, in a cabin by a frozen lake. We’ve owned a house that came with a coop and 6 chickens. Moved to Ontario, moved to Victoria, moved to France. The 11 places we’ve lived are: Collingwood, Vancouver; your dad and Shelagh’s; our house in Cloverdale; two cabins on the shoreline of Black Sturgeon Lake; Huntsville (Kelly and Sandy’s); Victoria (Fairfield Rd.; Carrick St.; and Newton St. [Shelbourne Apartments])
We’ve conceived five times. We’ve survived depression, two mental breakdowns and multiple kids in our home (with my daycare business). We’ve endured a law suit, a fraudulent tax accountant, being potless, both my parents having cancer, Callum’s numerous trips to emergency (in three countries) including three long hospital stays.
Professionally you’ve moved from a three-person family business to the hub of a global company. I’ve worked for not-for-profit agencies and high-tech corporations. I made it to the 2nd interview for ED of OB Canada. Together we’ve managed a base camp from conflict/community management, staff supervision, training and logistics to building and vehicle maintenance, energy source management and storm recovery. 24 hours a day 7 days a week we worked and played together and we thrived.
We’ve run dogsleds, hiked the Bugaboos, climbed glaciers, scuba-dived the Great Barrier Reef, walked around Uluru, water-sledged down a 7 meter waterfall, took the slow boat down the Mekong, skied at Whistler/Blackcomb, swam in the Mediterranean, made love on a roof-top, rock-climbed past Philosopher’s Perch, camped in Algonquin, hiked in the Lake District, trekked in the Alps and ran whitewater in kayaks and canoes. We’ve taken parenting courses, been to counseling and chilled out at Ko Phi Phi, Mazatlan, Powell River, Long Beach and Point No Point. We’ve eaten sushi, crocodile, peanut butter balls, bull’s balls, butter tea, bee larvae, haggis, dim sum, Mekong catfish, kangaroo tail and stir-fry on the streets of Bangkok containing mystery ingredients. We’ve been to the London Art Gallery, the Uffizi, and the Louvre. We’ve eaten Montreal bagels at 3 am and drunk Lao Lao with the locals. Over time we’ve adopted 2 cats, 4 fish, 6 chickens and neighbors. We’ve had better sex than 90% of the population (I haven’t interviewed the last 10%). We’ve moved countries and cultures.
We’ve created, with magic and the blessings of God and the Universe, a child; a full-on person; a Bucknell from Loewen-land. We’ve been awake at 4 am wondering why our kidlet is once again in our marital bed. We’ve watched him move every limb in a different direction at the speed of light, make jokes, orate elaborate stories, climb 25 feet up a tree, calmly pet a dog three times his size, organize and motivate a group in a game, sing a crying baby quiet. In amazement we’ve watched our incredibly social son adapt and make friends in a new culture where he can’t use his words. We watch him in amazement: inquisitive, freckled, brave. A small sturdy soldier holding an olive branch in a strange new world.
And we’re right there with him in the midst of this new adventure, struggling, persisting, overcoming; sometimes riding the wave and other times trying to put a bouncy castle between us and a crash and burn.
I get angry about it sometimes. Angry at myself for not learning French, angry about our finances, angry that you’re not happy (you were bored in Victoria though too). But I know we’ll survive it, weather it, grow from it and find our way home. Meanwhile, home must be each other, which is the way it should be.
So while we’re here, let’s be sensible with money but have some fun, invest in each other and our son … take the opportunity to solidify a relationship that is as battered, wily and good-humored as a pirate ship.
Take no prisoners but drink all the rum.
And decide to go home when the wind turns.
Cheer up Bucky-boy. Life is not permanent but spirit is, and I will love you always.
R
This is a love letter.
When you begin reading it might not seem like one, but it is. Keep reading until the end.
Over the duration of our marriage we’ve navigated through many challenges …
• Between us we’ve had 10 surgeries in 11 years
o Back; shoulder; ectopic twins; D&C; Callum caesarean; D&C; knee; TL; Hernia x2
• Totaled one vehicle but owned 7 cars and 2 motorcycles in total
• Explored 14 countries and lived in 2
o Oz; New Zealand; Malaysia; Thailand; Cambodia; Laos; India; Scotland; England; Mexico; U.S.A.; France; Italy; Canada
• Experienced desert expanse, prairie flatness, bottoms of oceans and tops of mountains, from -52C to + 46 C
• We’ve driven across most of Canada four times. We’ve flown to the U.K. 6 times.
• We’ve lived in 11 places in less than 10 years
o We’ve made our home in Point Grey Vancouver, in a cabin by a lake, in a cabin by a frozen lake. We’ve owned a house that came with a coop and 6 chickens. Moved to Ontario, moved to Victoria, moved to France. The 11 places we’ve lived are: Collingwood, Vancouver; your dad and Shelagh’s; our house in Cloverdale; two cabins on the shoreline of Black Sturgeon Lake; Huntsville (Kelly and Sandy’s); Victoria (Fairfield Rd.; Carrick St.; and Newton St. [Shelbourne Apartments])
We’ve conceived five times. We’ve survived depression, two mental breakdowns and multiple kids in our home (with my daycare business). We’ve endured a law suit, a fraudulent tax accountant, being potless, both my parents having cancer, Callum’s numerous trips to emergency (in three countries) including three long hospital stays.
Professionally you’ve moved from a three-person family business to the hub of a global company. I’ve worked for not-for-profit agencies and high-tech corporations. I made it to the 2nd interview for ED of OB Canada. Together we’ve managed a base camp from conflict/community management, staff supervision, training and logistics to building and vehicle maintenance, energy source management and storm recovery. 24 hours a day 7 days a week we worked and played together and we thrived.
We’ve run dogsleds, hiked the Bugaboos, climbed glaciers, scuba-dived the Great Barrier Reef, walked around Uluru, water-sledged down a 7 meter waterfall, took the slow boat down the Mekong, skied at Whistler/Blackcomb, swam in the Mediterranean, made love on a roof-top, rock-climbed past Philosopher’s Perch, camped in Algonquin, hiked in the Lake District, trekked in the Alps and ran whitewater in kayaks and canoes. We’ve taken parenting courses, been to counseling and chilled out at Ko Phi Phi, Mazatlan, Powell River, Long Beach and Point No Point. We’ve eaten sushi, crocodile, peanut butter balls, bull’s balls, butter tea, bee larvae, haggis, dim sum, Mekong catfish, kangaroo tail and stir-fry on the streets of Bangkok containing mystery ingredients. We’ve been to the London Art Gallery, the Uffizi, and the Louvre. We’ve eaten Montreal bagels at 3 am and drunk Lao Lao with the locals. Over time we’ve adopted 2 cats, 4 fish, 6 chickens and neighbors. We’ve had better sex than 90% of the population (I haven’t interviewed the last 10%). We’ve moved countries and cultures.
We’ve created, with magic and the blessings of God and the Universe, a child; a full-on person; a Bucknell from Loewen-land. We’ve been awake at 4 am wondering why our kidlet is once again in our marital bed. We’ve watched him move every limb in a different direction at the speed of light, make jokes, orate elaborate stories, climb 25 feet up a tree, calmly pet a dog three times his size, organize and motivate a group in a game, sing a crying baby quiet. In amazement we’ve watched our incredibly social son adapt and make friends in a new culture where he can’t use his words. We watch him in amazement: inquisitive, freckled, brave. A small sturdy soldier holding an olive branch in a strange new world.
And we’re right there with him in the midst of this new adventure, struggling, persisting, overcoming; sometimes riding the wave and other times trying to put a bouncy castle between us and a crash and burn.
I get angry about it sometimes. Angry at myself for not learning French, angry about our finances, angry that you’re not happy (you were bored in Victoria though too). But I know we’ll survive it, weather it, grow from it and find our way home. Meanwhile, home must be each other, which is the way it should be.
So while we’re here, let’s be sensible with money but have some fun, invest in each other and our son … take the opportunity to solidify a relationship that is as battered, wily and good-humored as a pirate ship.
Take no prisoners but drink all the rum.
And decide to go home when the wind turns.
Cheer up Bucky-boy. Life is not permanent but spirit is, and I will love you always.
R
Monday, November 23, 2009
RIDGE RAMBLING – AUGUST 2009
FAVOURITE THINGS
• My shopping trolley – saves my arms from becoming orangutan limbs
• My coffee bodum – mmm coffee… I get my grounds from Laos.
• Our Canon PowerShot S3 1S digital camera. I have taken 13GB of photos Jan – Aug!
• Public Transport – frequent, comprehensive coverage, clean and safe, local and national
• Gardens – though at first I mostly noticed the doggie-do areas.
• Museums free one Sunday a month
• Friendly – I like the mountain people here, they’re not pretentious.
• La Bastille – I love having a mountain in the middle of my town. Perspiration and inspiration.
• Food: Farmers’ markets, mountain fare and lack of preservatives
• Buzz downtown – love the energy, especially in the spring and early summer. Feels like 10pm when it’s 1am. Vivid colours, music and conversation spiced with laughter.
• Alps – each of the three ranges have such different characters. I’m indulging in them all.
• Tom Tom when we’re travelling (we borrow one). Saves many an argument.
• Rest stops – they’re well thought out, practical and inviting
• Baking – how can you NOT like baking?
• Architecture
• History – around every corner is a discovery
• Latin – this is definitely a Latin country in weather, style, habits and attitude
• Sculpture and art – everywhere, layers of it
EPIPHANIES
LANGUAGE LEARNING
I’ve been struggling with learning French. When I examine “why” it’s so tough, I realize I’m not satisfied with paring my conversation down to a couple of present tense simple sentences that could be spoken and understood by a preschooler, or a French poodle. My thoughts are not simple so I don’t get satisfaction communicating that way. At the same time, I’m not an audio learner and I’m half deaf. I’m not looking for excuses. I still have to learn it, whatever the barriers. It’s funny that for someone who loves language so much and who is a compulsive writer, that I have not been inspired to write while I’ve been here. My inclinations are to paint, to wander through the Alps breathing deeply, to celebrate every festival that the Isere region and its mountain people have to offer. It is to experience with all my senses this profoundly traditional and yet cutting edge of technology producing culture we’ve found ourselves in. I think the writing will come later.
The other funny thing about learning French is that when I get a chance to speak in English I find I can blather on and on about nothing. A friend of mine who’s an author pointed this out to me. There is such a joy in being understood that it’s hard to close the floodgates of conversation.
I find French grammar difficult to remember. When I teach English I try to incorporate people’s different learning styles. I’m not so lucky with my French classes. I’ll have to study in ways that allow me to assimilate the grammar through experiential learning. I think that’s why I excel in accumulating vocabulary, and why I can get around France with not much problem even though I speak like a twat. I remember words through seeing and experiencing them in context.
A friend of mine, Jesse, presented me with an awesome book called, “Talk Dirty French”. It examines the origins of words and the process by which they’ve morphed into how they’re said and what they mean today. It also looks at how words are formally used and written down, as opposed to how they’re spoken. It shows the influence of street speak, texting and slang. It’s a brilliant book. Reading about the context helps me to remember the words and to phrase my speech in a manner that is current to the culture and genuinely understood.
MISSING THE WILD IN WILDERNESS
I love wandering through the Alps here (call me Heidi) but I do miss the wilderness. It’s so manicured here. What’s cool about it is the integration of human culture, including mountain architecture, with the natural features of the land. There are few predators here, but there is a communion of creatures, humans and earth that has been symbiotic for centuries.
LETTERS FROM MY MOM
My mom sends Callum a letter almost every week. He insists I read them at bedtime. We do the challenges from the coffee chat cut-outs that she sends, and I read him the stories that she writes. He puts the stickers she sends onto his table or the fridge, and he sleeps with the little lizards she manages to smuggle through the mail. Although I miss her terribly, I feel like I’m getting to know a whole new side of her as she loves my son from afar.
YOGURT, GRENOBLE and NUTELLA DOUGHNUTS
(Carly, Bob and Owen come to visit)
Highlights of the visit:
• General Itinerary: Annecy, La Bastille, Grenoble, the local lake, Southern France, Carcassonne and the Mediterranean Sea, Pont du Gard and back to Annecy.
• Nutella Doughnuts – Carly bought them so frequently from our local boulangerie/patisserie (bread and pastry shop) that the bakers began to increase their daily output in anticipation of her morning visits.
• Conversation about fish – Callum and Owen had many in-depth philosophical conversations. One of them was about the mortality of fish.
• Cheese platters – we bought a cheese platter and invited some friends who are transplanted here from Canada. Yum. This is something the French do REALLY well.
• En route to the lake there was construction and a subsequent change to the bus schedule. Though my French language skills are sketchy, in about seven minutes I was able to figure out where the bus should be, ask the right questions, get us to where the bus ACTUALLY would be, and we ran several blocks in the process (Carly and I with our two five-year-olds). That I could compute the changes that fast showed me that I have indeed acclimatized to the French culture. Kudos to me.
• Les Chevaliers de Carcassonne – Grand Tournoi de Chevalerie: This was a spectacular jousting show. The horsemanship, the acting, the aesthetics of the presentation from costumes to attitude to body posture: it was an exceptional experience. It harkened the honor of old and the communion between person and horse, hawk and handler.
• Carly and I played Carcassonne in Carcassonne. How could we not!
• Different rhythms of families – It was interesting to live in such a small space (2 bedroom flat) and co-exist harmoniously, especially since we have such different rhythms. The P-K clan is early to rise and early to bed. The Bucknell clan … well, we’re not: we’re the opposite. Also, I suffer from FOMO: fear of missing out, whereas their family is more along the lines of – we don’t have to see everything on the first visit. We’d rather do a few things well and not feel rushed. There’s something to learn from that for sure.
• “Pilgrimage” – Carly put it perfectly. Carcassonne, even though some people might find it touristy, has a powerful effect on me. I feel reverence. She said, “It’s a pilgrimage.” Immediately a piece of intuitive knowledge plunked into place. I’ve always been a doer, not an observer. Here, I often want to “go see”. And it has to do with the pilgrimage: the spiritual adventure. It brings deep satisfaction. Peace.
• At the hotel swimming pool I had a terrible fall. I slipped while turning and banged my left shin on a marble edge. I didn’t have feeling in it for over 6 weeks. I was worried the impact would throw my hips out. Missing three discs makes me a tad more cautious.
• Famous Owen quote: “Callum and I are going to wreck havoc in the city.”
• Annecy – what a wondrous place. It won over Carly and Bob and it’s a place we’d take every visitor without ever tiring of it. Check out the slide show! We particularly had fun renting a pedal boat with a slide on it, and wandering around the medieval part of the city. Magic.
SASSENAGE CAVES
Went to the Sassenage Caves with Sam and Mark. Very cool. At one point we were more than two kilometers under the rock. Also, these caves fill with water for part of the year. They are crucial to the fresh-water supply of the region. All around are walking trails and a river with waterfalls that people enjoy canyoning.
HAIR
I haven’t cut or coloured my hair in five months. When I told Callum I was going to colour it he said, “But mom, you’re beautiful the way you are.”
SOFTENER STORY
Sometimes, despite our best attempts to understand French, we fail. That’s why we have two large bottles of softener. Col went to buy laundry soap, and came back with softener. I returned his bottle, and came back with yet another bottle of softener. Good grief.
TRAVEL vs. LIVING HERE
If we had decided to take a sabbatical and travel for two to six months (like we were originally planning) we would have been better off financially than moving here. I know we are experiencing entirely different things by being “part of the community”, living through the political riots, the strikes, the football celebrations, the seasons, the festivals, the weather, etc. than if we simply travelled here, but financially and emotionally it would have made much more sense to hunker down in Victoria and come PLAY here. One family we met from Vancouver did a house swap for eight weeks – three weeks in Grenoble, two weeks in Paris and three weeks in the south of France. They swapped everything – houses, vehicles, bicycles, maid service, toys, etc. And they were smart enough to rent out a room in their home to a student for eight months during the year, which paid for their flights. They saw and did more in their three weeks in this region than I had done in the previous three months (and I don’t sit on my laurels). The difference was that they had a car at their disposal and they didn’t have to deal with work or the day to day hassles that come with setting up a life here. All they needed to do was ENJOY. In addition to this, I have to add that a friend of ours who moved here for a year and then moved back to Victoria calculated the financial consequences and concluded it equaled taking an ENTIRE YEAR off from work. Imagine that.
LIKE THE AUSTRALIAN ABORIGINES – NOT SEEN, NOT NEEDED
When Colin and I were travelling through Australia I noted with dismay that the Australian Aborigines were often not even acknowledged by white-skinned locals. It was almost as if they were ghosts from another time, or in a strange time warp that allowed them to co-exist in the same space but not be seen. I asked one woman the time, and she looked at me as if I had just materialized out of the ether zone. Sometimes in France I feel the same way: I am not seen, I am not needed, I don’t belong. When we first came here I was determined to live in a French neighbourhood, make French friends, to truly integrate (while maintaining my Canadian identity and integrity of course). I thought, “I’m not going to be one of those people who spend time with English-speakers while living in France. I’m going to take FULL advantage of the cultural experience.” Well, ha ha ha. Whatever made me think that the French would care whether I integrate or not? Raised as a Mennonite who desires to live a life of service, having the personal issues of not wanting to put anyone out or ask for help, and recognizing (with the help of Aunt Josie and others) that it will be at least four years before I can have a full-on philosophical/political/spiritual conversation – in other words, talk about anything with substance and meaning beyond the niceties of how to squeeze fresh produce – all these things mean I have come to accept that my neighbourhood, Callum’s school, my work colleagues and my students will be French, but my community will be international.
JOB
I need to find a job here. I need a job that’s flexible – so I can drop off and pick up Callum from school and at least sometimes pick him up for lunch (due to his food sensitivities – they serve bread and cheese at every meal). I can’t work Wednesdays. And in this economy, there is a hiring freeze on in many of the international companies yet I need a position where I do not need to speak French. Minimum wage here is 8 Euros an hour. Babysitting pays 8 – 10, but it’s during the same hours as I have Callum. What kind of job am I going to get? How will I go about hunting for one? Stay tuned.
PHYSICAL GOALS
I am most motivated to get physically fit when I have an event to look forward to as well as a fitness level. Two events I would like to attend in the next year are an Olympic length triathlon (Paris or Annecy) and a March (the one in the Netherlands which occurs over four days and you can choose to march 20, 30, 40, or 50 km per day. I would choose 50 a day.) The Olympic length triathlon is 1.5 km swimming, 40 km biking and 10 km running … though I would walk. I simply need to be fast enough in the first two events to keep from getting disqualified time-wise when walking the third. The Annecy Triathlon would be cool because the lake is stunning, Col and Callum could accompany me there, and the biking part would likely be on some of the same terrain as the Tour de France. Too cool.
COL – NEW BOSS and BUILDING
Colin is unhappy about the move of buildings, longer commute, increased cost of food in the cafeteria and the fact that the air conditioning is broken in his ‘new’ building. Also, there are many communication mess-ups with computers and electrical meters as the building changes residents. However, his new/old boss Melanie is amazing at getting things done and smoothing things out. And Colin is going to Hungary/Budapest on the 13th so he's pretty stoked about that.
CALLUM
Callum is having anxiety about school and his behaviour reflects it. Impulsive behaviour, toilet language, wiggliness, inability to listen, lack of awareness of what his body is doing, increased agitation and vocal volume as well as verbal self-abuse (ie. I'm stupid) have cropped up again in full force. Why did my intelligent, compassionate, socially savvy, witty and physically coordinated boy turn a corner? Owen and Lucas’s visits made a huge difference. Callum looked forward to them for months; the thought soothed him when he felt lonely. But now the visits from friends are done for the year. Overall I think it's a combination of loneliness/depression (the words seem too strong but they capture my meaning), anxiety regarding school and me not being as strict regarding food and Omegas. I know school is stressful for Callum but we met three kids from his class last week and they all greeted him joyously. I know it'll settle down in a few weeks. We just need to get into the routine and learn this French language (damn it)! I had no idea we would find it so difficult.
WEEKEND HIKE
This weekend was awesome. Did a hike that included two mountain peaks on Saturday (with two of our English friends, Samantha and Mark). Callum and Colin joined us for the second peak. It felt great to get out into the wilderness, to explore, to be so physically active. It's very grounding for all of us and wonderful to explore the Alps on our doorstep. On Sunday I planned a secret event to celebrate our anniversary. We took a bus to Bourg d'Oisans (which is at the base of the steep road involving the 21 bends up to Les Deux Alpes that are a compulsory event for the Tour de France). The trip was about 1.5 hours through the magnificent Belledonne Mountain Range. Besides being a beautiful town, Bourg d'Oisans was sponsoring a free Moto Cross event for the day. It was awesome to breathe in 2 stroke oil and dust for an afternoon!
DAY IN EVIAN
Spent an unexpected and delicious day doing a road trip to and exploration of Evian with Melanie. While we were there we drank Evian of course, which you can get free flowing and which many people did – collecting it in Coke and Perrier bottles. While we were there we participated in a typical French conversation. It went something like this:
“Do you have a toilet here?”
“Yes.”
Needing to use the facilities, we chose to buy gelato at this establishment.
“Can we use the toilet?”
“No.”
“Why not?”
“It’s not for customers.”
Funny that where wonderful water is free, the toilets are not.
This week Callum starts school, I revise my CV and start looking for a job, I'm back on the right exercise track and we celebrate our anniversary. Colin's boss leaves for a month to get married and go on her honeymoon in Iceland. Colin gets ready for his trip to Hungary. And we get all our financial goals under control. Also, my sister is undergoing exploratory surgery. My mom is getting her check-up. And Ang and George get ever-closer to meeting and adopting Murron.
That's enough for now. Life is full.
Bises,
Ramona
• My shopping trolley – saves my arms from becoming orangutan limbs
• My coffee bodum – mmm coffee… I get my grounds from Laos.
• Our Canon PowerShot S3 1S digital camera. I have taken 13GB of photos Jan – Aug!
• Public Transport – frequent, comprehensive coverage, clean and safe, local and national
• Gardens – though at first I mostly noticed the doggie-do areas.
• Museums free one Sunday a month
• Friendly – I like the mountain people here, they’re not pretentious.
• La Bastille – I love having a mountain in the middle of my town. Perspiration and inspiration.
• Food: Farmers’ markets, mountain fare and lack of preservatives
• Buzz downtown – love the energy, especially in the spring and early summer. Feels like 10pm when it’s 1am. Vivid colours, music and conversation spiced with laughter.
• Alps – each of the three ranges have such different characters. I’m indulging in them all.
• Tom Tom when we’re travelling (we borrow one). Saves many an argument.
• Rest stops – they’re well thought out, practical and inviting
• Baking – how can you NOT like baking?
• Architecture
• History – around every corner is a discovery
• Latin – this is definitely a Latin country in weather, style, habits and attitude
• Sculpture and art – everywhere, layers of it
EPIPHANIES
LANGUAGE LEARNING
I’ve been struggling with learning French. When I examine “why” it’s so tough, I realize I’m not satisfied with paring my conversation down to a couple of present tense simple sentences that could be spoken and understood by a preschooler, or a French poodle. My thoughts are not simple so I don’t get satisfaction communicating that way. At the same time, I’m not an audio learner and I’m half deaf. I’m not looking for excuses. I still have to learn it, whatever the barriers. It’s funny that for someone who loves language so much and who is a compulsive writer, that I have not been inspired to write while I’ve been here. My inclinations are to paint, to wander through the Alps breathing deeply, to celebrate every festival that the Isere region and its mountain people have to offer. It is to experience with all my senses this profoundly traditional and yet cutting edge of technology producing culture we’ve found ourselves in. I think the writing will come later.
The other funny thing about learning French is that when I get a chance to speak in English I find I can blather on and on about nothing. A friend of mine who’s an author pointed this out to me. There is such a joy in being understood that it’s hard to close the floodgates of conversation.
I find French grammar difficult to remember. When I teach English I try to incorporate people’s different learning styles. I’m not so lucky with my French classes. I’ll have to study in ways that allow me to assimilate the grammar through experiential learning. I think that’s why I excel in accumulating vocabulary, and why I can get around France with not much problem even though I speak like a twat. I remember words through seeing and experiencing them in context.
A friend of mine, Jesse, presented me with an awesome book called, “Talk Dirty French”. It examines the origins of words and the process by which they’ve morphed into how they’re said and what they mean today. It also looks at how words are formally used and written down, as opposed to how they’re spoken. It shows the influence of street speak, texting and slang. It’s a brilliant book. Reading about the context helps me to remember the words and to phrase my speech in a manner that is current to the culture and genuinely understood.
MISSING THE WILD IN WILDERNESS
I love wandering through the Alps here (call me Heidi) but I do miss the wilderness. It’s so manicured here. What’s cool about it is the integration of human culture, including mountain architecture, with the natural features of the land. There are few predators here, but there is a communion of creatures, humans and earth that has been symbiotic for centuries.
LETTERS FROM MY MOM
My mom sends Callum a letter almost every week. He insists I read them at bedtime. We do the challenges from the coffee chat cut-outs that she sends, and I read him the stories that she writes. He puts the stickers she sends onto his table or the fridge, and he sleeps with the little lizards she manages to smuggle through the mail. Although I miss her terribly, I feel like I’m getting to know a whole new side of her as she loves my son from afar.
YOGURT, GRENOBLE and NUTELLA DOUGHNUTS
(Carly, Bob and Owen come to visit)
Highlights of the visit:
• General Itinerary: Annecy, La Bastille, Grenoble, the local lake, Southern France, Carcassonne and the Mediterranean Sea, Pont du Gard and back to Annecy.
• Nutella Doughnuts – Carly bought them so frequently from our local boulangerie/patisserie (bread and pastry shop) that the bakers began to increase their daily output in anticipation of her morning visits.
• Conversation about fish – Callum and Owen had many in-depth philosophical conversations. One of them was about the mortality of fish.
• Cheese platters – we bought a cheese platter and invited some friends who are transplanted here from Canada. Yum. This is something the French do REALLY well.
• En route to the lake there was construction and a subsequent change to the bus schedule. Though my French language skills are sketchy, in about seven minutes I was able to figure out where the bus should be, ask the right questions, get us to where the bus ACTUALLY would be, and we ran several blocks in the process (Carly and I with our two five-year-olds). That I could compute the changes that fast showed me that I have indeed acclimatized to the French culture. Kudos to me.
• Les Chevaliers de Carcassonne – Grand Tournoi de Chevalerie: This was a spectacular jousting show. The horsemanship, the acting, the aesthetics of the presentation from costumes to attitude to body posture: it was an exceptional experience. It harkened the honor of old and the communion between person and horse, hawk and handler.
• Carly and I played Carcassonne in Carcassonne. How could we not!
• Different rhythms of families – It was interesting to live in such a small space (2 bedroom flat) and co-exist harmoniously, especially since we have such different rhythms. The P-K clan is early to rise and early to bed. The Bucknell clan … well, we’re not: we’re the opposite. Also, I suffer from FOMO: fear of missing out, whereas their family is more along the lines of – we don’t have to see everything on the first visit. We’d rather do a few things well and not feel rushed. There’s something to learn from that for sure.
• “Pilgrimage” – Carly put it perfectly. Carcassonne, even though some people might find it touristy, has a powerful effect on me. I feel reverence. She said, “It’s a pilgrimage.” Immediately a piece of intuitive knowledge plunked into place. I’ve always been a doer, not an observer. Here, I often want to “go see”. And it has to do with the pilgrimage: the spiritual adventure. It brings deep satisfaction. Peace.
• At the hotel swimming pool I had a terrible fall. I slipped while turning and banged my left shin on a marble edge. I didn’t have feeling in it for over 6 weeks. I was worried the impact would throw my hips out. Missing three discs makes me a tad more cautious.
• Famous Owen quote: “Callum and I are going to wreck havoc in the city.”
• Annecy – what a wondrous place. It won over Carly and Bob and it’s a place we’d take every visitor without ever tiring of it. Check out the slide show! We particularly had fun renting a pedal boat with a slide on it, and wandering around the medieval part of the city. Magic.
SASSENAGE CAVES
Went to the Sassenage Caves with Sam and Mark. Very cool. At one point we were more than two kilometers under the rock. Also, these caves fill with water for part of the year. They are crucial to the fresh-water supply of the region. All around are walking trails and a river with waterfalls that people enjoy canyoning.
HAIR
I haven’t cut or coloured my hair in five months. When I told Callum I was going to colour it he said, “But mom, you’re beautiful the way you are.”
SOFTENER STORY
Sometimes, despite our best attempts to understand French, we fail. That’s why we have two large bottles of softener. Col went to buy laundry soap, and came back with softener. I returned his bottle, and came back with yet another bottle of softener. Good grief.
TRAVEL vs. LIVING HERE
If we had decided to take a sabbatical and travel for two to six months (like we were originally planning) we would have been better off financially than moving here. I know we are experiencing entirely different things by being “part of the community”, living through the political riots, the strikes, the football celebrations, the seasons, the festivals, the weather, etc. than if we simply travelled here, but financially and emotionally it would have made much more sense to hunker down in Victoria and come PLAY here. One family we met from Vancouver did a house swap for eight weeks – three weeks in Grenoble, two weeks in Paris and three weeks in the south of France. They swapped everything – houses, vehicles, bicycles, maid service, toys, etc. And they were smart enough to rent out a room in their home to a student for eight months during the year, which paid for their flights. They saw and did more in their three weeks in this region than I had done in the previous three months (and I don’t sit on my laurels). The difference was that they had a car at their disposal and they didn’t have to deal with work or the day to day hassles that come with setting up a life here. All they needed to do was ENJOY. In addition to this, I have to add that a friend of ours who moved here for a year and then moved back to Victoria calculated the financial consequences and concluded it equaled taking an ENTIRE YEAR off from work. Imagine that.
LIKE THE AUSTRALIAN ABORIGINES – NOT SEEN, NOT NEEDED
When Colin and I were travelling through Australia I noted with dismay that the Australian Aborigines were often not even acknowledged by white-skinned locals. It was almost as if they were ghosts from another time, or in a strange time warp that allowed them to co-exist in the same space but not be seen. I asked one woman the time, and she looked at me as if I had just materialized out of the ether zone. Sometimes in France I feel the same way: I am not seen, I am not needed, I don’t belong. When we first came here I was determined to live in a French neighbourhood, make French friends, to truly integrate (while maintaining my Canadian identity and integrity of course). I thought, “I’m not going to be one of those people who spend time with English-speakers while living in France. I’m going to take FULL advantage of the cultural experience.” Well, ha ha ha. Whatever made me think that the French would care whether I integrate or not? Raised as a Mennonite who desires to live a life of service, having the personal issues of not wanting to put anyone out or ask for help, and recognizing (with the help of Aunt Josie and others) that it will be at least four years before I can have a full-on philosophical/political/spiritual conversation – in other words, talk about anything with substance and meaning beyond the niceties of how to squeeze fresh produce – all these things mean I have come to accept that my neighbourhood, Callum’s school, my work colleagues and my students will be French, but my community will be international.
JOB
I need to find a job here. I need a job that’s flexible – so I can drop off and pick up Callum from school and at least sometimes pick him up for lunch (due to his food sensitivities – they serve bread and cheese at every meal). I can’t work Wednesdays. And in this economy, there is a hiring freeze on in many of the international companies yet I need a position where I do not need to speak French. Minimum wage here is 8 Euros an hour. Babysitting pays 8 – 10, but it’s during the same hours as I have Callum. What kind of job am I going to get? How will I go about hunting for one? Stay tuned.
PHYSICAL GOALS
I am most motivated to get physically fit when I have an event to look forward to as well as a fitness level. Two events I would like to attend in the next year are an Olympic length triathlon (Paris or Annecy) and a March (the one in the Netherlands which occurs over four days and you can choose to march 20, 30, 40, or 50 km per day. I would choose 50 a day.) The Olympic length triathlon is 1.5 km swimming, 40 km biking and 10 km running … though I would walk. I simply need to be fast enough in the first two events to keep from getting disqualified time-wise when walking the third. The Annecy Triathlon would be cool because the lake is stunning, Col and Callum could accompany me there, and the biking part would likely be on some of the same terrain as the Tour de France. Too cool.
COL – NEW BOSS and BUILDING
Colin is unhappy about the move of buildings, longer commute, increased cost of food in the cafeteria and the fact that the air conditioning is broken in his ‘new’ building. Also, there are many communication mess-ups with computers and electrical meters as the building changes residents. However, his new/old boss Melanie is amazing at getting things done and smoothing things out. And Colin is going to Hungary/Budapest on the 13th so he's pretty stoked about that.
CALLUM
Callum is having anxiety about school and his behaviour reflects it. Impulsive behaviour, toilet language, wiggliness, inability to listen, lack of awareness of what his body is doing, increased agitation and vocal volume as well as verbal self-abuse (ie. I'm stupid) have cropped up again in full force. Why did my intelligent, compassionate, socially savvy, witty and physically coordinated boy turn a corner? Owen and Lucas’s visits made a huge difference. Callum looked forward to them for months; the thought soothed him when he felt lonely. But now the visits from friends are done for the year. Overall I think it's a combination of loneliness/depression (the words seem too strong but they capture my meaning), anxiety regarding school and me not being as strict regarding food and Omegas. I know school is stressful for Callum but we met three kids from his class last week and they all greeted him joyously. I know it'll settle down in a few weeks. We just need to get into the routine and learn this French language (damn it)! I had no idea we would find it so difficult.
WEEKEND HIKE
This weekend was awesome. Did a hike that included two mountain peaks on Saturday (with two of our English friends, Samantha and Mark). Callum and Colin joined us for the second peak. It felt great to get out into the wilderness, to explore, to be so physically active. It's very grounding for all of us and wonderful to explore the Alps on our doorstep. On Sunday I planned a secret event to celebrate our anniversary. We took a bus to Bourg d'Oisans (which is at the base of the steep road involving the 21 bends up to Les Deux Alpes that are a compulsory event for the Tour de France). The trip was about 1.5 hours through the magnificent Belledonne Mountain Range. Besides being a beautiful town, Bourg d'Oisans was sponsoring a free Moto Cross event for the day. It was awesome to breathe in 2 stroke oil and dust for an afternoon!
DAY IN EVIAN
Spent an unexpected and delicious day doing a road trip to and exploration of Evian with Melanie. While we were there we drank Evian of course, which you can get free flowing and which many people did – collecting it in Coke and Perrier bottles. While we were there we participated in a typical French conversation. It went something like this:
“Do you have a toilet here?”
“Yes.”
Needing to use the facilities, we chose to buy gelato at this establishment.
“Can we use the toilet?”
“No.”
“Why not?”
“It’s not for customers.”
Funny that where wonderful water is free, the toilets are not.
This week Callum starts school, I revise my CV and start looking for a job, I'm back on the right exercise track and we celebrate our anniversary. Colin's boss leaves for a month to get married and go on her honeymoon in Iceland. Colin gets ready for his trip to Hungary. And we get all our financial goals under control. Also, my sister is undergoing exploratory surgery. My mom is getting her check-up. And Ang and George get ever-closer to meeting and adopting Murron.
That's enough for now. Life is full.
Bises,
Ramona
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